At some point in our
life we have all felt FEAR...Fear can be crippling, debilitating, and all
consuming! I know this because I have dealt with it firsthand. I
have always been a "high stress" person, I work better under
pressure...most of us do! But a few years ago after my third child, I developed
severe postpartum anxiety. It was a nightmare; I had never dealt with
anything so hard in my life! I thought I was "SUPERWOMAN",
I thought I could do it ALL, but boy was I wrong. No matter how
structured, organized, and "all together" I was, it didn't
matter. I had three kids under the age of 5, a husband that traveled, a
graduate student, a worry wart, and the pressure of being the "PERFECT" wife, mom, and
friend.
My world turned
upside down in June of 2012 when God woke me up and said “Get your priorities
in order"! For a little over a year I dealt with panic attacks and
anxiety/fear. I felt a complete loss of control over my body and my thoughts. Fear of something happening to me, fear of something
happening to my children, fear of not being the best wife and mother, worry
about finances, worry of not knowing what I was supposed to do with
my life and the list could go on consumed my mind. Fear, worry, anxiety & panic were my life
for over a year. I still deal with it today and I have to make a daily effort
to not think fearful, worrisome thoughts, but I know that through God's
strength, I will NOT live in FEAR! Even while I am typing this my eyes
fill with tears as I realize how far I've come in two years and where God
has brought me today. God woke me up and made me realize I was missing
out on so many things in my life because of control, fear, and worry. I tried to
control everything out of fear...fear to protect myself of getting hurt, fear
of my children getting hurt; fear of losing control...But God had more and has
more for me and for you. He has a plan and future for me and for you,
plans to prosper us, not to harm us, plans to give us a hope and a future
(Jeremiah 29:11). I realize now this is all a part of my testimony; it has made me who I
am today and who I will be in the future. This entire journey has
made me a better person, wife, mother, and friend.
So I want to
encourage all of you today to confront your fears. "Until the power
of fear is broken in our lives, we are held captive to it. To fulfill His
plan for our lives and to enjoy all the blessings He wants to give us, we simply
must refuse to live in fear" Joyce Meyer.
If you struggle
with fear, worry, anxiety, panic, depression, illness, whatever it is, accept it, confront it,
and give it to Him. I know as a wife & mother that worry and fear
comes with the territory, we worry out of love for our children, but that's not
the life God has for you! You can do ALL things with His
strength. And God can use anything for good; you just have to let
him! I never thought that my anxiety & panic attacks could be used for
good, but it is, it is molding and shaping me to be the women God
wants me to be. Joshua 1:9, "Be strong, vigorous, and very
courageous. Be not afraid".
Below are pictures of verses that I keep in my phone and when I begin to worry or fearful thoughts creep into my head I read them!
You are a strong, fearless, talented, beautiful, and compassionate woman!!! Choose to live BOLDLY & COURAGEOUSLY! Tell yourself today I will NOT live in FEAR.
xoxo
Ali